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10 Things that only courier drivers will understand

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Friday, 24 August 2018 GMT

Author: Staveley Head

Nobody said it was easy, and we get it, life as a courier is anything but. If it’s not the hard labour or long drives, it’s the hanging baskets in front of house numbers and misleading sat-navs. As experts in courier insurance, we’ve taken a look at the 10 things only couriers will know…

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1. House Number?

Contently driving through an unfamiliar area, optimal levels of confidence pulsing through your veins, as this is bread and butter stuff. But then, the feeling of contentment begins to plummet, as it becomes obvious that the unfamiliar street you’re in has begun its transformation into the Hanging Gardens of Babylon. Yeah, they look ok, but why do these need to be conveniently placed in front of the house number?! And if that doesn’t brighten up your day, the address of your next parcel displaying words such as “Rose Cottage” or “The Coach House” sure will…not.

2. Delivering parcels to people you know

When you’re rushing around, traffics extended your drive time by an hour and you deliver a parcel to that old friend of your mothers, and she just keeps talking to you. We’ve all been there! But you just can’t seem to drag yourself away.

3. Volume down, concentration up

You’re driving through the neighbourhood searching for the house to deliver the parcel to, you start to slow down and turn down the music volume…but what has the volume got to do with finding the house? Have you ever noticed when delivering a parcel and cautiously scowling the whole street to find the house, you turn the volume down? Is this some sort of magical concentration enhancer? Does it work?

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4. Black Friday

Goodbye to the hellish worry of Friday the 13th, and hello to the hellish worry of Black Friday, the couriers equivalent to Friday the 13th. Whilst the actual day isn’t so bad, the online orders that take place are assured to make your next week a very busy one.

5. Holidays are coming…

That moment when you’re looking forward to Christmas but then realise you’re a courier…Ok so it’s not all bad, you’re a modern-day Santa Clause! Except, if the customer doesn’t answer, and you attempt to deliver through the chimney, you may be prosecuted and you may be handed a restraining order…minor differences.

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6. Furry friends

This is a catch 22, on the one hand, there’s nothing better to cheer up your day than man’s best friend coming to greet you. On the other hand, while you’re walking into each driveway, everybody’s in work and there’s a calm atmosphere in the air with the minimalist sound of bird song…but rest assured, as soon as you touch that gate you’ll hear the loudest bark ever…but this is just the kind of thing you need to help wake you up in the morning…right?

7. Postcode satnav malfunction

We’re living in the digital age, whereby you can pretty much do anything with the click of a button in the palm of your hand. You’ve even got satellite navigation that, from time to time, sends you into the middle of nowhere when you enter a genuine postcode. Better keep the traditional survey map in the glove compartment.

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8. Too safe a place?

So, they’ve provided a safe space to place the parcel and we get it, it’s got to be as safe and inconspicuous as possible. The problem is, it’s so safe that not even you can find it.

9. The hand-held terminal

It’s not a gripe with modern technology, it’s just sometimes it would appear quicker the old way! You always feel that nervousness when the loading symbol appears on the screen, will it work, or will it freeze? Let’s spin the wheel to find out! They’re also amazing at scanning bar codes…really…

10. Couriers/Mind readers

If you didn’t know it already, the modern courier is required to read minds. Yes, couriers are now expected to know where “Dave’s house opposite the chippy” is …could it get any better? You bet ya! They’ve also forgotten to leave a contact number too. I mean couriers are good, but they’re not that good.

Have you got any other things that only couriers will understand? Let us know on our Facebook and Twitter pages.

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